NBA RANKINGS - by RP

DSS Readers,

Happy New Year to you and yours!

Sorry about the month long drought in rankings. Again, I have no excuses. I am lazy.

With that, I have come up with some New Year’s Resolutions/Wishes for each team. Some of them are for selfish wants…

Your Boy,

RP

1. Cleveland Cavaliers (28-6) – No more 1-4 Sets, even when Z is out. Get LeBron off the ball and on the block. Please don’t trade Sasha.


2. Los Angeles Lakers (28-6) – Give Pau a new set of balls.


3. Orlando Magic (28-8) – Run the offense through Howard. Jump shooting teams never win championships.


4. Boston Celtics (29-8) – Teach Rondo how to shoot. Either that or send Doc to Popovich Camp to learn about making adjustments. ASAP!


5. San Antonio Spurs (24-11) – Good health is all they need for another run at the chip.


6. Denver Nuggets (25-12) – Keep playing that D and find a way to maintain with ‘Melo out.


7. New Orleans Hornets (21-11) – Get that swagger back. Seems like they are still missing a little something.


8. Atlanta Hawks (22-12) – Grow up fast or that home court is going to be gone in a blink.


9. Detroit Pistons (21-12) – Not sure if anything will matter. They are a lame duck like George W. at this point. Sorry players.


10. Utah Jazz (21-15) – Get healthy fast and start that push in a stacked West.


11. Houston Rockets (22-15) – Some consistency and less crying from T-Mac.


12. Dallas Mavericks (22-13) – Uhhhh, break it up! It’s over!


13. Portland Trailblazers (21-14) – Get Oden in shape and Roy back on the floor.


14. Phoenix Suns (19-13) – Please start running again. The pathetic attempt to slow it down didn’t work.


15. Miami Heat (18-16) – Teach Beasley how to play defense.


16. New Jersey Nets (18-18) – Trade Vince.


17. Toronto Raptors (15-21) – Pray that Bosh doesn’t leave.


18. Milwaukee Bucks (17-20) – Trade Mike Redd.


19. Chicago Bulls (15-20) – Trade Joakim.


20. Philadelphia 76ers (15-20) – Purchase a time machine and not to pay Igoudala #1 guy dollars.


21. Indiana Pacers (13-22) – Figure out a way to get Granger in the All-Star Game.


22. Memphis Grizzlies (11-25) – Send McHale a Valentine thanking him for Mayo.


23. Minnesota Timberwolves (10-25) – Trade away Al Jefferson for Wally Z! Expiring contract foo!!!


24. New York Knicks (13-21) – Buy out Stephon, so we get to see more of him on the Celts.


25. Charlotte Bobcats (13-23) – Hey Mike, “Congratulations on the (impending) wedding, I hope your wife know she got a player for life, and that’s no bullsh*ttin.” Oh ya, and come back!


26. Golden State Warriors (10-27) – Pray that the Mississippi Bullet hasn’t lost his incredible athleticism.


27. Sacramento Kings (8-28) – Move to Vegas! Sorry, I know they have great fans, but free agents don’t sign with Sacramento.


28. Los Angeles Clippers (8-27) – Appeal Ricky D’s drug suspension.


29. Washington Wizards (7-27) – Trade Antaawn and reward him for years of good service.


30. Oklahoma City Thunder (5-31) – Get excited for the hometown kid, Blake Griffin. Amare 2.0. Watch out!
    

Since I’ve been out for a while, we won’t have a player of the week this time. Here are my early season award winners…

MVP – LeBron James

DMVP – Dwight Howard

MIP – Devin Harris

ROY – O.J. Mayo

COY – Stan Van Gundy